The following are some aphorisms about friendship. They are all connected by the theme of responsibility in friendship.

The best friendships are those that bring out the best in you, making you grow as a person. This applies to all parties involved in the friendship—something that one seldom considers. Do you bring out the best in your friends?

Worthwhile friendships are predicated on a two-way exchange of wisdom, inspiration, and motivation.

A piece of good self-improvement advice says that you should be friends with positive people and avoid negative people because positivity and negativity are both contagious. It is good advice, indeed. So, then it also means you owe it to your friends to not be negative around them, not to infect them with your negativity.

Try whining about your misfortunes every time you meet your friend and find out how "true" your friendship is. And just so you don’t get it wrong, you will have deserved the desertion.

It is not that you should never talk about your misfortunes to a friend, but upon doing so if and when you get deserted, instead of adding that to your list of complaints, you should know there was only so much negativity they could afford to accept into their life.

It is said that if your friend doesn’t help you in your bad times, he was never really a friend, to begin with. A thought like that is a product of selfish and often infantile tendencies. A friend should and would help you in your bad time, sure. But if you are having bad times often, you must ask yourself, what’s in it for them? Hence, to think that only the friend in need is a friend indeed is selfish and infantile.

Every social interaction can be viewed in terms of give-and-take. Friendship is no exception. Both or all parties must bring value to the friendship for it to survive. Or else it becomes a drag and won’t be anymore.

Be the kind of person you would like to be friends with. Everyone wants to be friends with people who are better versions of themselves in one way or another.

Don’t view friendship as something you get for free, something that comes without any responsibility on your part. Like any relationship, friendship needs nurturing—in the form of the value you bring.

When you meet a non-smoking friend who considers smoking to be unambiguously bad, don’t smoke in their company. That’s not adding value and would be a disservice to the friendship.

You are an average of 5-10 people you spend most of your active time with. They likely include your best friends. The better your friends are, the better the average is, and the better you will be. Now consider this: How do you contribute to the average?

Over a period of time, friends’ contributions to the friendship should be net positive for both parties. If not, that will manifest by way of a decreasing frequency of interactions.

I don’t think that friendships break until and unless expressly declared thus. They change forms as the underlying dynamic—the mutual exchange of wisdom, inspiration, and motivation—changes. The friends who were once close and are not-so-close now may again become close when the dynamic improves.

Worthwhile friendships are predicated on a two-way exchange of wisdom, inspiration, and motivation. Therefore, positivity and self-improvement are your responsibilities not only towards yourself but also towards your friends if you wish to keep them around.